Here I am in Edmonton. I don’t know anyone really except my children. My son is in a shared situation and my daughter has a small 2 bedroom space that she shares with a friend.
After 3 days here, I went in search of a gym. They offer lovely week “try it” passes… its a great way to get access to a gym without paying for a membership. The one closest to my daughter’s house is 24 hours. EVEN BETTER! I have issues with working out in front of other people. I can go ANY TIME I WANT.
(as a caveat, yes – I DO know that no one else cares about the fat chick working out other than to think “Hey! good on ya!” or hope that I’m using good form)
I found the gym. I signed up. It did cost me $21 – that was for the access key. $3 a day to work out. WOOT! Better than drop in fees. I’m good with that.
I signed up on Wednesday. Told the guy I wanted to come in on Thursday early am. This is a 24 hour gym, but it’s only staffed for 9 hours a day. He said no worries, he’d see if he could get me signed up to start at midnight. I wasn’t worried.
9am rolled around. There was no workout. I don’t know what happened. Lazy? Too tired? Anxiety? I don’t know. What I do know is that I did not go. And then we were waiting for a call from the doctor to have my daughter induced.
And then we went to the hospital so she could be assessed (yay! everything normal!)
And then we came home to make dinner.
And then my son came over.
And then it was late.
And then I was tired.
And then… well then I couldn’t sleep. Maybe I should have gone to the gym. But I didn’t.
Today – I wanted to go to the gym. I woke up, waiting to hear about my daughter’s induction. Due to the serious insomnia – I woke up at noon. Don’t want to go to the gym when someone’s there… including staff.
We’d gotten free passes to the Y for the boys to swim – so I dropped them off there -the intent was to go home, eat a light dinner then go work out, then go get boys, go home, go to sleep.
There wasn’t enough time to get a work out in between dropping them off and picking them up.
I could hear the excuses in my mind already forming.
It’s too late.
You need sleep.
You can do it tomorrow.
The boys will be with you.
It’s silly to take them home, then go out again.
Just don’t bother.
And so… I got in my car… and picked up my boys. They were late getting out of the pool. By the time I got back to where the gym was, it was 10.30pm.
I NEVER workout that late.
And yet… I did. I did my 1FW Day 1. (yep, it’s Friday. Next week of workouts are out Sunday, but fuck that shit – I did Day 1!!!) And then I did C25K day 1 week 1.
Because. I’m going to be fit.
Excuses are just that. If I don’t exercise, then what? If I quit… what will I do? Get fatter? Quit derby? End up on “My 600lb Life?”
Quit and do what exactly?
If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always gotten.
End of story. If I change nothing, nothing changes. But if I change things… everything changes.
Truth is – I’m not happy where I am. I can literally feel my ass growing.
But as an aside – I weighed myself at the gym – and I’m down another 3lbs.
So the changes I’m making are working. And I have no excuse to not go to the gym. It’s there. I have nothing else to do besides sit on my ass in my daughter’s house waiting for her to go into labour.