Signs or Self-Sabotage?

I believe in signs, do you?

My van caught fire when I was trying to go look for work in Kamloops.  We ignored the sign and moved anyhow.   It wasn’t the best move for us, but we did it anyhow.

I got all sorts of signs from my husband that moving to Quesnel was a good idea, even though it meant taking my kids from their friends, their home, and moving me from all my friends.  I don’t regret it at all.

I’ve been back in derby consistently for the past 2 months.  I’m getting stronger. I’m getting better.  My cardio is ah MAZE ing.

However…  There’s an issue.  I get a cramp in in my left leg when I’m doing my 27/5. Its starting to piss me off.  It’s a new issue.  Its a muscular issue.

My last set of laps I got 23 in 5 minutes.  2 of those minutes I was in agony.  My leg was cramped up, I was fighting with my leg so my back started cramping up, and in the end… 23 laps.  I need 4 more.

It’s NOT a cardio issue.  When I stop skating, I’m not gasping for air and my recovery is quick.   I’ve got the cardio part.

It’s just a muscle issue.

So my problem is (and anyone in the fitness/physio field, please please feel free to offer suggestions) is that my hamstring on my left side turns into a rock while I’m skating laps.

Is this something that will work itself out with time?  Is it something that will eventually morph into a super strong hamstring that gives me 30-35 laps in 5?

Or is this a sign that I’m doing something that I shouldn’t be right now?

I keep pushing.  I keep trying.  But here it is, 8 hours before I’m supposed to take the test AGAIN (I’m not ever going to stop playing unless its a retirement after I pass) and I can feel the muscle knotting up.

I’ve tried magnesium.  Foam roller. Yoga.  Stretching.

The only thing I haven’t tried is professional help – a professional massage, physio etc… because it’s not in the budget right now.

So… sign? or just my body adjusting to the new physical fitness routine I’m putting it through?

Add the snow to today – the first real snowfall of the season, and I’m just… frustrated.

I want to play.  I want to skate. I’m putting a LOT of stress on myself about getting/being fit and being able to bout.

And really – I just want to know if it’ll all work out… my body will adjust and move the way I want it to, and I’ll be on skates all spring/summer or if it’s a mental block that I have to work my way through.

Either possibility exists.  I don’t know which is more likely… *sigh*

Blahhhhh…. I just wanna be here again:

Jane Bouting



About sunnyjane

On a journey of fitness, health and healing. One blog focuses primarily on health & fitness ( and the other is about my path through widowhood ( Life is a Journey. I'm learning to enjoy the ride.
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