Letting Go

From the time I was 12 years old, I’ve been obsessed with the number.

My mom took me to a TOPS meeting, stepped me on the scale and when the number came up at 120lbs – she freaked and thought I was overweight (I wasn’t – I was very healthy for my age & height)

The number has ruled my life.

And for the last 15+ years, the number has been significant.  The number has been frightening.  The number reached the point at which I told my husband “If I ever get that heavy – just shoot me.  Life wouldn’t be worth living”

The scale has determined my life, my mood and my choices.

Just before Christmas – Coach Michelle challenged us to toss the scale.

Tossing the Scale

 

Yeah. I did it.  I wasn’t really happy about it.   Its gone.  Landfilled.

But I tossed it.

Because I am more than that number.  That number will not tell anything other than the pull of gravity on my body.  That’s it.  It won’t tell me anything else.

Scale

 

Yesterday was weigh/measure day.   I measured.  I did not weigh.

I will not own a scale again – and I don’t know that I will ever weigh myself again.    Perhaps only on reviews.  Once every 3 months or so.

But the scale no longer rules my life.  The scale is gone.  I am focused on my health, what I’m eating and how much energy I have.  I am focused on how my clothes fit.  How far and fast I can skate.

But the number?  It doesn’t matter anymore.

Advertisements

About sunnyjane

On a journey of fitness, health and healing. One blog focuses primarily on health & fitness (sunnyjane.wordpress.com) and the other is about my path through widowhood (widowspath.wordpress.com) Life is a Journey. I'm learning to enjoy the ride.
This entry was posted in Fitness, Self-esteem, Weight Loss and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s