Changes In Thinking

There’s this thread in the back of my thought processes that tells me… “This is temporary, once you lose the weight – you’ll be able to go back to eating whatever you want”

That’s seriously fucked up.

Seriously.

Do you know what will happen if I continue thinking that way?

I’ll get fat again.  IF I get skinny.

This isn’t about being able to eat whatever I want – although it’s nice to be able to have a treat once in a while – it’s about making healthy choices.

I *can* eat the chocolate at work.

I *can* eat the girl guide cookies.

I *can* eat A&W burgers.

I *can* eat a 12 oz steak with fries and hollandaise sauce.

I have that choice at any moment.

I don’t WANT TO.

Whenever I slip and eat those things – I feel gross. My stomach hurts. My head hurts. I wish I hadn’t.

There’s a direct correlation between what I eat and how I feel.  I KNOW this.

But the part of my brain that is 2 and stomping her feet and having a temper tantrum wants the damn chocolate.

temper-tantrum-girl-425ds061609_getty

She wants the wine.

She wants the burger.

She also wants the princess life she led before her husband got sick…. but he was one in a million and that lifestyle got her very fat.

I went back to the beginning of this blog – my weight was 278.2.

Last weigh in my weight was 238.5.

Since January 2011 – I have lost 40lbs.   22lbs of that has been in the past 3 months – since I started onefitwidow.com.

Seriously.

I lost more weight changing how I eat in the past 3 months than I did in the prior 2 1/2 years.

And I feel better.

And I’m healthier.

This isn’t a temporary fix.  It’s a lifestyle change.  It’s looking at life differently.  Looking at food differently.  Looking at how I spend my time differently.

It’s changing my thinking because the thinking I did before got me to 278.2lbs and I don’t EVER want to go there again.

Choices

Sweaty pic

 

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About sunnyjane

On a journey of fitness, health and healing. One blog focuses primarily on health & fitness (sunnyjane.wordpress.com) and the other is about my path through widowhood (widowspath.wordpress.com) Life is a Journey. I'm learning to enjoy the ride.
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