I have, at various times, posted my “in progress” pictures.
When I first started.
A year after that.
There hasn’t been a huge amount of change – but by the time I hit the last picture, I was starting to feel good about myself and my body. I was starting to see and FEEL change and was looking forward to the continued downward spiral.
Then I fell during a boot camp and got a concussion.
There was a 6 week… lull… in exercise. I was forced to allow my brain to recover and then Christmas, and then a couple weeks before derby started up again.
I didn’t eat healthy, I didn’t get back into exercise the way I should have when I was allowed to, and somehow, I figured that I would either maintain or continue to lose weight.
I would get dressed and see myself as slender, just a few pounds overweight, curvy.
I somehow managed to convince myself that I wasn’t as big as I actually was.
I know my weight. I’m not stupid. I weigh myself every couple days and it doesn’t change appreciably. I have difficulty walking up stairs without getting winded.
I don’t fit in some rides at the PNE.
But somehow, I managed to convince myself that I wasn’t as big as I actually am.
I did a photo shoot this weekend – I wanted to feel good about my body – about the way I look NOW… because regardless of what I weigh, I am beautiful… I am sexxy… I am amazing… and I refuse to be happy with myself only if I’m skinny.
So… from my photo shoot today…
There was other photos, but they are not appropriate for a family-friendly blog 😉 They’re for my personal collection 😉
I know how big I am…and I’m fucking GORGEOUS! Now I have to get as healthy as I am gorgeous 😉 :p