I want to play

My biggest fear when I go to practices and see all the fresh meat who are light years ahead of me (where I was, where I am) after 3 practices is that I’ll get left behind.

I get it.  I’m overweight.  I’m slow.  It is taking me longer to get up to skillz than it *should* or *has* taken other people.

But I remember having a conversation with someone – she said she never passed her skillz test so she gave up?  decided to become head NSO.

I don’t want to.  I want to play.  I want to hit and get hit.  I want to feel the joy of stepping in front of an opposing player and sitting on them so they can’t get past me.

Something in me has changed though.  A fear like this used to make me give up.  If I can’t get to where I want to go – I’ll quit.

I’m not quitting. I may take longer than other people to get there – but I’ll get there.   I have success each practice I show up at.  I have success each time I don’t quit.

Last night I succeeded in playing “shark tank” and being one of the last 5 (both rounds) to be knocked out.   I discovered I can take a hit.  And I can hit hard.   It was fun 😀

Now to get my agility and speed up.

About sunnyjane

On a journey of fitness, health and healing. One blog focuses primarily on health & fitness (sunnyjane.wordpress.com) and the other is about my path through widowhood (widowspath.wordpress.com) Life is a Journey. I'm learning to enjoy the ride.
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One Response to I want to play

  1. I can see this came from a place of truth SJ and for that reason it resonates in my heart. That place of fear can stop us from taking that last step, you know the one, that step just before change. Good for you for pushing through and thank you for sharing with those of us on the same path right behind you.

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